Two More Feet

“Call to me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.” – Jeremiah 33:3

In December of 2011, David and I dreamed of starting our family. Months and months went by without success, our dreams becoming more and more crushed under the weight of disappointment, feelings of failure, sadness, and anger. Months became years. Dreams became tests, hormones, monitoring, many unsuccessful artificial inseminations, surgery, and more disappointment. I started to become really angry and bitter, at God, at myself, at the world around me.

I hated living in that angry, bitter state and I constantly tried to stay above water without drowning in it. I turned to prayer. Shortly after, our prayers started changing as adoption was placed right in front of us and provided peace and hope in our hearts again. The timing of Aria and Myles’ adoption story is beyond coincidence as we got the call from our social worker to move forward with our home-study process around the same time the twins were conceived, without any of us knowing His plan at that time, we moved forward and the pieces of our heart were starting to be put back together.

As we went quickly through our home study process, we were an approved waiting family in early February 2015. We got the most amazing call of our lives on April 2nd – the call that there were boy/girl twins and we were chosen to be their parents! Never in my life did I imagine any of this to happen, especially the timing of all of it as we look back and connect the dots that were perfectly aligned and orchestrated.

Our hearts were healed the moment we held Aria and Myles. The years’ worth of pain, waiting, and disappointments made perfect sense the moment I looked into our son and daughter’s beautiful brown eyes and stroked their perfect head full of silky brown hair. They were worth every tear, every prayer cried out, every moment struggled; I would do it 10 times over again for this outcome.

They were God’s plan for us. All of this time, He knew what He had in store and it was much bigger, much mightier than we ever could have dreamed of.

Around the time the twins turned one month old, still in awe of the amazing life we were given only a few short weeks before, distracted by the fullness of love we had in our hearts – I realized my cycle was late.

I quickly felt sick to my stomach. There was no way, was there?

Our family was completed with Aria and Myles; on cloud 9 in love with them, and still trying to overcome the overnight surprise of twins…I mentioned my calendar to David and as we both stared at each other in scared denial, we laughed a little – we aren’t ‘those’ people that this happens to…

After a weekend full of trying to explain the delayed cycle to myself, I packed up our 4 week old twins for a Target run to buy a box of pregnancy tests. I can only imagine what the cashier was thinking in her head…

I went home, got the twins fed, and couldn’t hold out any longer. I needed reassurance that I was indeed off in my calculations due to lack of sleep, I took the test.

A plus sign showed up immediately.

At that moment, I realized that even still, we are not in control of our lives and the past month should have proven that to me enough but that moment, that moment I realized how little we have to do with our futures. We waited and prayed to be parents for 3.5 years and in one month we went from 0 to 3. God’s plan was still unfolding right before our very eyes.

I called David to see if he could come home early from work that Monday afternoon. He could tell something happened as I was freaking out slightly (which may be an understatement, I was scared to death…). When I told him the test was positive, he laughed. I think at that moment, that’s all we could do. God not only gave us our April Fool’s babies, but he’s definitely proven his sense of humor now. 🙂

My doctor had me come in a few times over the next few weeks for repeated bloodwork and two early ultrasounds. It all became reality as we saw our little surprise miracle tie-breaker on the screen, heart flickering and wiggling around.

To say we feel blessed is an understatement. I can honestly say that God touched our lives and I will forever be thankful for the struggle and the joy that followed – all 3 of them! He has gifted us the opportunity to experience parenthood both through adoption and biology and both are truly miracles to us! These three babies of ours were perfectly created as a part of this plan for our lives to intertwine at these very moments.

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Baby #3 is due early January 2016. Aria and Myles will be just over 9 months old. It will always be a party at our house and we are still amazed at the events that have unfolded in the last 3 months of our lives.

For my friends still in-waiting…I pray for you weekly. I pray that our story brings you hope, peace, and strength when your patience is running thin. God is pulling for you too, His plan is still in progress as he orchestrates your future to be perfect and great and mightier than you could have ever imagined.

2 Months Old!

Hello world! We are all doing good despite my lack of blogging efforts! The twins are now just over 2 months old! (!?!??!)

I can’t believe how fast the last 2 months have went! They are such great little babies and are the light of our lives. It’s so fun to watch them change and grow but still so sad at the same time. If I could have any magic power it would be to slow time down because it definitely is going at lightening speeds.

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Aria – Aria is our little doll. She is laid back, patient, and throws out smiles with little effort on our part! She loves to be read to, go for walks in the stroller, and be outside. Her hair has beautiful soft curls that are getting curlier by the second and her eyes and lashes have become one of my favorite features on her to stare at. She also has started to giggle some and likes to have parties in her crib at 3 AM giggling. It’s a sweet, sweet sound to wake up to!

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Myles – Myles is our little Mr. Serious and sometimes makes you work for a smile and other times he’ll throw them out there like bread crumbs to birds! He is going to have THE greatest facial expressions and often lifts his right eyebrow at us. Although he isn’t as patient as Aria (it’s a man thing I’m sure of it!), he loves to cuddle and if given his favorite blanket, he settles right down. Our lovely day care friend realized one day that the blanket we had sent with him for the day wasn’t cutting it but his sister’s sure did the trick! Luckily it’s a mint green and white polka dot blanket and although it has two coral birdies in the corner and ruffles all around the edges (hey, it could have been her hot pink blanket right?!) – that thing goes everywhere with us now and I have a good feeling it always will. It’s adorable to see how much it comforts him though!

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Last weekend we took the kids to their first hockey scrimmage. Myles is really into watching anything active and stayed awake the whole time watching the players on the ice go back and forth. I think it made Dad very proud!

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The weather has been beautiful and summer-like, finally, so we have been getting outside with them as much as we can! Our backyard has wonderful big trees that provide lots of shade and the kids love to watch the branches above them move in the breeze. I think we’ll be spending lots of time outdoors with the kids as they grow and I’m super excited for that because that’s the only place I ever want to be!

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Sleep has been going fairly good! About every 3rd night they sleep completely through the night, then they have a night or two each thrown in-between where one will be a little more awake at bedtime than the other or one will wake up around 2/3 AM and be wide awake. Day care has helped tremendously with getting them more on a schedule and getting lots of fresh air throughout the day has helped make some really great nights! We have heard so many say “I’m not sure how you do it with twins!?” but quite honestly, I’m not sure how we would do it with just one? They make it fairly easy on us and I would gladly take 4 babies as good as Aria and Myles than have one really fussy baby! My heart goes out to parents of colicky babies, you are the real superheroes!!!

They are both growing right on track, are great little eaters, and have almost doubled their birth weights. Although I don’t want it to come any faster than it already will, we are excited to see them continue to grow into little people and see their personalities really come out!

IMG_20150602_123658And of course Bentley had to say hi! He’s adjusting well and doing great with the twins.