Two More Feet

“Call to me and I will answer you and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know.” – Jeremiah 33:3

In December of 2011, David and I dreamed of starting our family. Months and months went by without success, our dreams becoming more and more crushed under the weight of disappointment, feelings of failure, sadness, and anger. Months became years. Dreams became tests, hormones, monitoring, many unsuccessful artificial inseminations, surgery, and more disappointment. I started to become really angry and bitter, at God, at myself, at the world around me.

I hated living in that angry, bitter state and I constantly tried to stay above water without drowning in it. I turned to prayer. Shortly after, our prayers started changing as adoption was placed right in front of us and provided peace and hope in our hearts again. The timing of Aria and Myles’ adoption story is beyond coincidence as we got the call from our social worker to move forward with our home-study process around the same time the twins were conceived, without any of us knowing His plan at that time, we moved forward and the pieces of our heart were starting to be put back together.

As we went quickly through our home study process, we were an approved waiting family in early February 2015. We got the most amazing call of our lives on April 2nd – the call that there were boy/girl twins and we were chosen to be their parents! Never in my life did I imagine any of this to happen, especially the timing of all of it as we look back and connect the dots that were perfectly aligned and orchestrated.

Our hearts were healed the moment we held Aria and Myles. The years’ worth of pain, waiting, and disappointments made perfect sense the moment I looked into our son and daughter’s beautiful brown eyes and stroked their perfect head full of silky brown hair. They were worth every tear, every prayer cried out, every moment struggled; I would do it 10 times over again for this outcome.

They were God’s plan for us. All of this time, He knew what He had in store and it was much bigger, much mightier than we ever could have dreamed of.

Around the time the twins turned one month old, still in awe of the amazing life we were given only a few short weeks before, distracted by the fullness of love we had in our hearts – I realized my cycle was late.

I quickly felt sick to my stomach. There was no way, was there?

Our family was completed with Aria and Myles; on cloud 9 in love with them, and still trying to overcome the overnight surprise of twins…I mentioned my calendar to David and as we both stared at each other in scared denial, we laughed a little – we aren’t ‘those’ people that this happens to…

After a weekend full of trying to explain the delayed cycle to myself, I packed up our 4 week old twins for a Target run to buy a box of pregnancy tests. I can only imagine what the cashier was thinking in her head…

I went home, got the twins fed, and couldn’t hold out any longer. I needed reassurance that I was indeed off in my calculations due to lack of sleep, I took the test.

A plus sign showed up immediately.

At that moment, I realized that even still, we are not in control of our lives and the past month should have proven that to me enough but that moment, that moment I realized how little we have to do with our futures. We waited and prayed to be parents for 3.5 years and in one month we went from 0 to 3. God’s plan was still unfolding right before our very eyes.

I called David to see if he could come home early from work that Monday afternoon. He could tell something happened as I was freaking out slightly (which may be an understatement, I was scared to death…). When I told him the test was positive, he laughed. I think at that moment, that’s all we could do. God not only gave us our April Fool’s babies, but he’s definitely proven his sense of humor now. 🙂

My doctor had me come in a few times over the next few weeks for repeated bloodwork and two early ultrasounds. It all became reality as we saw our little surprise miracle tie-breaker on the screen, heart flickering and wiggling around.

To say we feel blessed is an understatement. I can honestly say that God touched our lives and I will forever be thankful for the struggle and the joy that followed – all 3 of them! He has gifted us the opportunity to experience parenthood both through adoption and biology and both are truly miracles to us! These three babies of ours were perfectly created as a part of this plan for our lives to intertwine at these very moments.

Baby #3 is due early January 2016. Aria and Myles will be just over 9 months old. It will always be a party at our house and we are still amazed at the events that have unfolded in the last 3 months of our lives.

For my friends still in-waiting…I pray for you weekly. I pray that our story brings you hope, peace, and strength when your patience is running thin. God is pulling for you too, His plan is still in progress as he orchestrates your future to be perfect and great and mightier than you could have ever imagined.